So as I was petting my cat and crying the other day, for what felt like no reason, I suddenly had an alarming thought or premonition. I pictured myself shuffling through my house, crying and deeply sad, while a baby, my baby, sobs in it's crib. I could really picture it. and it scared me. It shouldn't because what mother hasn't cried tears of frustration while her baby is crying AGAIN? but I knew I was foreseeing the effects of my depression on my role as a mother.
I immediately googled "should depressed people have babies?". (and isn't it just like my generation to turn to google?) Anyway, in my results I found an article which seemed to resonate with me. I had never heard the term prenatal depression before and it makes perfect sense. How many of us with mental illness like depression and anxiety have conceived while we were feeling these symptoms? Does it hurt the baby? I think there are studies out there showing all different results.
Should we, as mentally ill people, feel guilty for making a baby human who will inherit our illnesses? It's definitely true that mental illness runs in families. but, hear me out, what if we were prepared for this event and chose to educate our children on how to deal with the problem? I don't think mental illness is going anywhere anytime soon, so I think passing on our traits, our strengths and our weaknesses, is part of the deal of having babies.
Also there's the whole concept of taking prescribed medications and conceiving. How do we really know for sure that our "pregnancy safe" meds aren't affecting our fetus? What hurts the fetus more, medications that stave off the depression/anxiety or the stress of feeling these symptoms full force. I am not asking these questions to open a dialogue of fear, but I do want to share these thoughts because I think it's important. I think it's important for us to share these feelings together. I want a community of supportive and open honesty, and I feel like it's just getting started.
What are you fertility woes? Your baby hopes and dreams? I'm struggling with what my future will look like. How much money will I have to spend? and how much heartbreak?
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| baby me |
I immediately googled "should depressed people have babies?". (and isn't it just like my generation to turn to google?) Anyway, in my results I found an article which seemed to resonate with me. I had never heard the term prenatal depression before and it makes perfect sense. How many of us with mental illness like depression and anxiety have conceived while we were feeling these symptoms? Does it hurt the baby? I think there are studies out there showing all different results.
Should we, as mentally ill people, feel guilty for making a baby human who will inherit our illnesses? It's definitely true that mental illness runs in families. but, hear me out, what if we were prepared for this event and chose to educate our children on how to deal with the problem? I don't think mental illness is going anywhere anytime soon, so I think passing on our traits, our strengths and our weaknesses, is part of the deal of having babies.
Also there's the whole concept of taking prescribed medications and conceiving. How do we really know for sure that our "pregnancy safe" meds aren't affecting our fetus? What hurts the fetus more, medications that stave off the depression/anxiety or the stress of feeling these symptoms full force. I am not asking these questions to open a dialogue of fear, but I do want to share these thoughts because I think it's important. I think it's important for us to share these feelings together. I want a community of supportive and open honesty, and I feel like it's just getting started.
What are you fertility woes? Your baby hopes and dreams? I'm struggling with what my future will look like. How much money will I have to spend? and how much heartbreak?
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