Hey babes- 2 blogs in one day?! That's quite a blessing! No really, for me it's such a blessing to be able to write to you twice in one day. God, it's such a release! I've been struggling a lot lately. Shits hard right now. I've been keeping up with my daily meditations for the most part. If you didn't know, my goal was to meditate every day during November. This quest could not have come at a better time because *gestures broadly to the whole world*. I'm adding prayer to the meditations too because the world needs so much love and guidance from God right now. I know I talk much about religion on here but you may be hearing more about it. Truth is we we've been looking for a church to call home since moving to Northern Michigan but covid has put a stop to that. Any higher powers that be that you believe in, now is the time to believe even harder and make your faith even stronger.
I cried during my meditation today. I don't know how many of you remember but when Peanut passed away, even before she did, I made it a goal to see her and feel her during my meditations to give myself added comfort and to stay close to her soul. I felt her today during my session and although crying seems counterintuitive to the practice, I think I needed it. I needed to feel vulnerable in that moment and have a release. I felt much better afterwards. and I was truly happy that I didn't do my makeup before my wax appointment after all because makeup makes crying so much messier than it already is. I rushed around getting some greeting cards in the mail to brighten up the day for some people close to me in my life that I can't physically see right now. Which is most people. I'm just glad that the people I can see are still safe and happy for the most part.
As we go day to day through out our lives, many of us are not seeing friends and family so that we don't risk getting them sick and instead our lives are filled with the people we work with. Having a non-toxic work environment is so important right now, more than ever. It just seems wrong though. I see my co-workers and the wonderful people who I get salon services from (shout out to Nicole! Love you girl!) but seeing them daily or monthly is strange when we also can't see our loved ones. Is it worth it to drive to go see family members through the car windshield knowing that the temptation is there to embrace? I don't think so. Not right now. The time for that was during the summer and most of us didn't think it would be the last time we would see them. We held on so tight to the hopes of the holidays. I'm getting off subject here...
Is anyone else having a harder time with pandemic and all the anxiety that comes with it this surge than the first surge? The first time around we had the spring time and warmer weather and blooming flowers in our yards and longer days to look forward to. Now...well now it just seems some how worse. Worse maybe because of all the other crap that has happened since then. The wild fires, global warming and climate change, civil rights, riots, police brutality, politics and the election, and on top of all of that, death after death after death. I'm feeling more turned off by the idea of having kids more and more. Sad but true. Again, I look at the affordability of life and...health care and college and housing crisis and feel like it's damn near torture to introduce someone to this world and care for them for 18 years and then tell them to have fun and do there best and enjoy life because living a successful life in America seems kinda hopeless. We need to make a lot of changes.
On to the main subject though: doom scrolling. Merriam-Webster says:
Doomscrolling and doomsurfing are new terms referring to the tendency to continue to surf or scroll through bad news, even though that news is saddening, disheartening, or depressing. Many people are finding themselves reading continuously bad news about COVID-19 without the ability to stop or step back.
I mean, I felt like with the popularity of true crime and the thousands of people who are subscribed to subreddits such with topics about murder mysteries etc we we're already kind of headed this way. The definition I gave above talks about this behavior happening in regards to covid-19 news but 2020 in general! It seems like most news is bad. and the drama on facebook, it's like a train wreck we can't look away from. There are so many animated gifs that we can put in reply to anything that shows eating popcorn as a reference to us being entertained by the drama. In the day of facebook "karens" and online arguing in a place that's meant for lighthearted conversation between friends we can't afford to make things any worse for us than they already are. but I can't stop. I can't stop. I feel like we need to constantly be tuned into the news and our phones and God-forbid we miss an update from the governor about what action we can't make now.
*sigh* just know, please know, you are not alone in this action. I'm doing it to. Most of us are. Any suggestions on how to stop doomscrolling? I'm all ears.
 |
| the face I make in reaction to anything lately |
Hang in there. This, too, shall pass.
ReplyDelete